How the Holidays Can Affect Grief, Trauma, and Mental Health

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, connection, and celebration. For many people, though, the holidays can feel heavy, overwhelming, or even painful. If you’re navigating grief, trauma, or ongoing mental health challenges, this time of year can intensify emotions in ways that are difficult to explain — and even harder to manage.

Grief tends to surface more strongly during the holidays. Traditions, anniversaries, and gatherings can highlight the absence of someone who is no longer there. Even years after a loss, familiar songs, scents, or rituals can stir memories and emotions that feel as raw as ever. This doesn’t mean you’re “backsliding” in your healing — it means your loss still matters.

For individuals with trauma histories, the holidays can also bring an increase in triggers. Changes in routine, crowded spaces, family dynamics, or expectations around togetherness can activate the nervous system. You may notice heightened anxiety, irritability, emotional numbness, or a strong desire to withdraw. These reactions are not signs of weakness; they are your body responding to perceived stress and past experiences.

Mental health challenges such as depression and anxiety can feel amplified during this season as well. Shorter days, disrupted schedules, financial pressure, and social comparison can all contribute to a sense of exhaustion or disconnection. The cultural pressure to appear happy can make it especially isolating to struggle quietly while everyone else seems to be celebrating.

It’s important to remember that there is no “right” way to experience the holidays. You are allowed to set boundaries, modify traditions, or opt out of events altogether if that’s what your well-being requires. You are also allowed to feel moments of joy alongside sadness — these emotions can coexist without canceling each other out.

If this season feels particularly difficult, gentle support can make a meaningful difference. Therapy offers a space where your experience can be acknowledged without judgment, where you don’t have to minimize your feelings, and where you can explore ways to move through the holidays with greater steadiness and care.

The holidays don’t have to be perfect. They don’t have to look like anyone else’s. What matters most is honoring where you are and giving yourself permission to move through this season in the way that feels safest and most supportive for you.